The last train to Cougarville…

I have to admit several embarassing things today. First, I’ve been sucked into the Twilight phenomenon and I know I’m entirely too old to be on board.

I read the first book, determined to hate it completely. But, actually, the whole vampire, werewolf, supernatural teen love story of it all reeled me in. At least it was different, I told myself as I poured page after page wondering what would be come of Edward and Bella. Immature, I know…sigh…

By the time I was halfway through the second book, I knew I was hooked. This was the book that everyone tells me is the worst of all the series and I couldn’t put it down.

I watched the Twilight movie at that point, amid my sister’s constant ravings about Robert Pattison and how perfect a male specimen he is to the world. And, I didn’t get it. You mean this pale guy who needs an good eyebrow pluck?

In fact, the whole movie fell a little flat with me. Of course, my brother-in-law came in halfway through and I sat, face-flushed and embarassed while I watched pretending not to want to watch it. So, that MIGHT have put a damper on it.

As I rounded out the second book, I felt something peculiar happening. I found myself leaving “Camp Edward” completely for “Camp Jacob.” I know, I know you’re thinking, “please, vampires are totally sexier than werewolves,” but Edward was annoying me with his aloofness and absence, where Jake never gave up on Bella and he had the whole interesting Native American thing going for him too. By the end of the book, I was a big fan of Jake.

Then, the other day, I saw the trailer for the second series film, New Moon. Here you go, I’ll share it here. (I know all you closet Twilight readers are going to watch it right now…don’t try to hide it.)

And, oh MY, did that werewolf catch my attention! I immediately (and embarassingly) went online to find out more about the super hot actor who played him. IMDB.com did not let me down. And, as I scrolled down wondering why I recognized his name, I saw his year of birth and realized…(uber blush)…he’s only 17. A baby. He looked soooo young in his IMDB photo too. Really TOO young.

Good Lord, I’m 38! What is wrong with me, I thought? That’s almost perverse. It makes me feel very “cougar” like, a term that I’ve grown to hate with a passion. Plus, I have a nephew that is that age! GROSS! (I’m not even including a picture of said actor here because all I could find looked like something that might appear in Teen Beat and I’m still traumatized by myself.)

Then, I scrolled through his past work and it slapped me right in the face.

This actor is the FREAKING KID that played Sharkboy in Sharkboy and LavaGirl. I was lusting after Sharkboy? Are you KIDDING ME? I might as well be drooling over damn Harry Potter at this point. Ew! Ew! Ewwww!

So, in an effort to erase my indisgressions, I vow to faithfully look at the following photos every day. (Scroll over them for the names.)

Each of these hunks is my age or older and entirely appropriate for me to drool over. More importantly, they’ll keep me off that last train to Cougarville…because my friends, I’ll admit it, I came dangerously close to going for a ride.